13+ Witty and Funny Responses to “How Are You?”

If you're like the majority of people, your standard response to someone asking how you're doing is "Good." Add some humor and wit to the conversation.

What's up with you? People ask this question on a daily basis. You usually say something like "you're doing fine" in return.

That is not inherently flawed. However, it doesn't carry on the discussion. Take a look at the following samples if you want to make an impression or if you want to avoid using the same answers every time.

You'll come across astute, sardonic, humorous, and witty answers to the query, "How are you?"

Well, well, well, if it isn’t the question of the day.
Fabulous, but I could be lying.
Like you care!
Better than you, probably.
Alive and still fabulous, thanks for asking.
Trying to stay positive, but people like you make it hard.
If I were any sassier, I'd need a warning label.
As fine as I look!
Better than I was before you asked.
Too blessed to be stressed, unlike some people.
I’d be better if I were you.
Busy being fabulous.
Living my best dramatic life.
Like a boss, a really tired boss.
Trying to keep my sass under control.
Better than your attitude.
Ready to throw some sass around.
Trying not to be fabulous, but it’s not working.